bookmarks #2
what I've been watching, reading, and generally enjoying lately
Hi! I’m here to recommend things for you to consume (hopefully in a thoughtful, relatively low carbon emissions way).
What I’ve been watching
Meditations For the Anxious Mind
This is one of my favorite YouTube channels. I don’t know how to describe it other than spoken word poems/commentary about things like run clubs, corporate girlies, male feminists, creatives, and short kings. The host (and presumed owner of said anxious mind) Frankie deadpans to the camera about the chosen subgroup/concept while someone (ostensibly from said group) stands next to him and tries to keep a straight face. Each video is 5 minutes or less, it is very tongue in cheek and a little bit absurd, and every line he speaks is amazing. Some notable quotes below.
“Conditioned by a system that told them ambition equals freedom, all structural inequalities become personal growth journeys pink-washed into challenges to overcome with grit, gratitude, and Google Calendar. This is not girl power. It’s famine mindset in matcha flavor with Canva graphics and a motivational quote that says, ‘Empowered women empower women.’”
“To protect themselves against the art of not knowing self-defense, short kings have molded themselves into the loudest and most volatile person in the room in the hopes that their performative display of social dominance will scare away all the tall predators who don’t need to stand on a chair to get the protein powder out of the cupboard.”
“Creatives are really good at expressing their feelings. It’s all they talk about. In an unstable economy based on gig work, emotions become the sole currency of the financially insecure. The liberal mythology surrounding creative work would have you believe that creatives are those among us who are brave enough to get out there and chase their dreams, but it’s easy to chase your dreams when you wake up in a four poster bedroom in your parents’ castle who hail from a long line of aristocratic nobility and if you kick their family tree I’m pretty sure a few slaves will fall out.”
The Queen of Versailles (tw: amazon prime link, that’s where the movie’s streaming)
I rewatched this documentary recently and it is still so good. So good, that it has now been adapted into a Broadway musical. Kristen Chenoweth stars and the guy who wrote Wicked wrote the music. But we’re not talking about the musical today! We’re talking about the original, about a billionaire couple beset by the financial crisis. Jackie Siegel is the titular queen and, with her husband David, they are building one of the largest houses in America (modeled after the Versailles palace). Unfortunately for them, the 2008 recession occurs before the house is finished. Also unfortunate for them, David’s company (a timeshare resort firm) is badly impacted (because they bought properties using cheap credit, and sold timeshares to people who couldn’t afford it).
It’s a character study of Jackie and David, an indictment of the American Dream, and an intimate look at the 2008 crisis and a billionaire family forced to downsize.
What I’ve been reading
A Marriage at Sea by Sophie Elmhirst
This nonfiction book is about a British couple (Maurice and Maralyn) who sold everything they owned to buy a boat and sail the ocean. But several months into their voyage, a whale collided with their boat and it sank. They gathered what food and supplies they could, and deboarded onto a dinghy and raft. That’s where they lived for the next four months as they struggled to survive.
Maurice and Maralyn hunted turtles and used their meat as bait to catch fish. Some of the turtles were kept as pets, something to look after and give them a reason to live. Maurice was mostly despondent and convinced they would die. Maralyn kept them going, caring for Maurice when he got sick, and dreaming of the things they’d do when they were rescued. Post-rescue, Maralyn imagined hosting dinner parties (which she carefully crafted menus for). And, once they got out of this mess, they would build a new boat for their next adventure (their current predicament not deterring them).
They spent four months alone together, with sharks, whales, dolphins, and squids among their neighbors. They lit their flares (some being duds) and waved their arms and shouted when they saw another boat in the distance, but it wasn’t until the seventh boat passed that they were rescued.
It’s a survival epic, a love story, and a character study rolled into one. It’s funny and heart wrenching, and with all the praise I’m giving this book, you’d think I’m being paid by the word to promote it (I’m not being paid to write anything).
I read this en route to a friend’s wedding and held back tears during the three-hour Greyhound bus. I kept gazing out onto the highway thinking, I want a love like that. Or at least elements of a love like that. Maurice and Maralyn were not model citizens by any means and I would not volunteer to almost die in the Pacific. That said, their lives make for an amazing story and Sophie Elmhirst more than does them justice.
Alison Green’s Ask a Manager blog
I love this blog. Alison Green gives workplace advice to letter writers sharing their professional dilemmas. When I have questions about professional work environments and situations, I go on Ask a Manager or I call my mom. My mom is unfortunately not available 24/7, and so this blog is my salve. Here’s a sampling of Alison’s wisdom, across the inane, petty, and weird:
I turned down a job offer and now the recruiter is invoicing me
what’s up with people responding to emails with a phone call?
my coworker insists on celebrating my birthday even though I’ve asked her not to
What I’ve been doing
Looking at my phone less (or attempting to)
I apparently am a sheep because, even though staring slack-jawed at my phone is deeply unenjoyable (especially on the subway, when I am without WiFi and continually, pointlessly swipe up to refresh my internet connection in the tunnels), I can only be convinced something is bad if someone else tells me. Blackbird Spyplane published a piece recently, You don’t look cool looking at your phone*, and god I wish they had told me that years ago.
“You ever see people out walking their dogs? The dogs are all smiles… gazes mirthful… tongues lolling. They’ve been cooped up inside, they wanna scamper, they want nothing between them and the vibrant wonder of life. Contrast this energy with that of their owners, who have also been cooped up, and yet emerge only to plod around slack-jawed, pupils glassy, dimly aware of their surroundings as they continue to fixate on screens.
There’s a tragedy tucked into this farce: Since the first iPhone came out in 2007, there are almost no dogs currently living who knew a time when their owners did not stare at their phones constantly during walks.
The dog’s the one with the collar, but you tell me who’s really ‘leashed,’ friend.”
If ever I have a reason for anything, it usually comes down to aesthetics. So I am actively trying to look at my phone less. My screen time is currently hovering around 4 hours which is not terrible. Someday I will get myself a flip phone, but I haven’t shed enough of my sheep-ness yet (I’d be too embarrassed by my green non-iMessage text bubbles).
*The article is behind a paywall but I have five Blackbird Spyplane gift subscriptions to give out if anyone wants one.
Eating kale caesar pasta salad
If you love caesar salad, you will love this kale caesar pasta salad. I honestly don’t know how else to sell it other than caesar salad with more carbs. I made it and I was eating it for days and enjoyed every second. I don’t know if that was very good for my health but it was wonderful for my mind and spirit. I’ve only made this recipe once but it was such a great experience that I don’t need any additional evidence of its worthiness in order to recommend it to you, dear reader.
Some notes: you could probably skip the bread crumbs if you’re wanting to do less work. You probably can’t swap out the kale for another green, unless it’s something pretty hearty. Swapping in romaine or some other watery lettuce will lead to a sad, soggy pasta salad that won’t keep for long.
I know this’ll sound a little bit granola, but I am a kale apologist - it’s filling and stands up to heavy salad dressings like caesar. It also makes me feel healthy. If texture is an issue, massaging the kale makes it easier to chew and digest (though maybe I’ve lost you with the massaging, and now you will never cook your own kale at home). Kale is good for soups and you can easily sauté it for a little extra veggies with your meal. I guess I mainly like this recipe because it is a vehicle for kale, which I’m apparently a very big fan of. Writing really reveals your interiority, like which vegetable you can wax poetic about for 200 words.
Going to the Kewpie Mayo Factory
I recently went to Japan and I’m trying my best not to be annoying about it. I bought so many stupid little trinkets while I was there, but one of the best things I experienced was free. No, it wasn’t getting to spend two weeks of quality time with my boyfriend. It was going to the Kewpie Mayo Factory*.
A caveat: the Kewpie Mayo Factory is not an active factory. It is more of an office building with occasional tours and cute themed areas that are informative and designed to get you to buy more mayo. They have a gift shop, though it primarily sells inedible objects like keychains, baby bibs, and very large kewpie mayo baby dolls. I learned so much about the history of mayo, the history of Kewpie mayo, and what makes Kewpie mayo better than all the other mayos. The tour was free and it is really just consumerist propaganda. That said, I loved every second.
If you for some reason find yourself in Tokyo and want to spend an hour learning about mayo, this is the place for you.
*It is technically called the Kewpie Mayo Terrace but that sounds less fun (even though it is more accurate and the actual name).
